Cardboard testimony

A sermon about an indescribable, unfathomable, incomprehensible, all powerful God who comes into our lives and does what cannot be done to bring glory and honor to His Name.

This begs the question: If we did this at at my church, what would happen?

What's in a name?

I have been doing a lot of photography work, and part of the not as much fun side is the bookkeeping/processing. One of the things I noticed was the last names of the kids, many don't match the parents. I once heard of a couple who when they decided to get married, he took her last name, because it was respected and had a godly local heritage and he felt that it was important to his new family.

What's the value of a name?

• Heritage.
  
• Stability.
  
• Belonging.
  
• Security.
  
• Hope.
  
• Being known
  
• I am loved.

If all goes well, we shall adopt our niece and give her our last name sometime this year! She has found stability in her young life, here under our roof.

Unfocused Eyes

I was holding our new little Gwen, (7 lbs 11.5 oz, 20 inches) She finally opened her eyes so we could see more than a slit. She was searching for my voice, Dad was somewhere out there, just beyond sight. It is an interesting fact that babies can only focus their eyes a few inches out.
Here she was searching for the voice of her father, who loves her and will care for her, more than any other man in her life. I have her matching ID bracelet. Only her parents can access her and take her from the hospital. If anyone tries, the whole floor gets locked down! The elevators stop working!
There's only one relationship that has more love, more safety, and more security that than: God as our heavenly father loves us so much that no one can take us from His hand. His hand never grows tired or weak, and nothing has the power to snatch us away.
As gazed into her eyes of slate blue gray, she wanted to see me, she wanted to know who loved her so much, it hurt. Do I want to see God like that, knowing that He's there and loves me, holds me and cares about everything about my life. I can't focus on Him, because I can't see Him.
Do my spiritual eyes improve as I grow? Yes, but I'm myopic. Myopia which is the noun from which we get the adjective is defined by Miriam-Webster's as 1 : a condition in which the visual images come to a focus in front of the retina of the eye resulting especially in defective vision of distant objects 2 : a lack of foresight or discernment : a narrow view of something.
I'll admit it, I am. God take away my myopia and focus my eyes on You.

Hope for the future

There is hope for the future. As I sat in the hospital holding our little Gwen Adele, I cried. I thought of who she might become. A woman someday who loves God. For now, her little eyes just peeked open, unfocused, trying to understand this new world of light, cold, and swaddling. I got on my spiritual knees and prayed that I would be the father she needs, that I could slay the dragons at the beginning of her life and protect her from evil with God's help.
April been a very difficult month for our family, but God's timing is perfect on everything. He has never let the righteous go hungry (or eat cat food). But holding my new little girl, who barely opens her eyes, there is hope for what God is going to do. April may have been a dark canyon, but May is the golden morning sunshine of a new chapter.
As I drove into the hospital and listened to KLOVE. I heard a listener story, she had lost a baby at 5 months and she gave it all to God. God gave her the peace that what had been taken away would be restored of her future daughter-in-laws, one has the same name of the daughter they lost and one's birthday was the day she was due. I remembered how we lost the first pregnancy very early on, and how many times we nearly lost Moriah during her pregnancy. God has been very good, no real complications, a great OB office, we had an awesome midwife, and got a 2 for 1 deal on doulas. Those two doulas worked hard and stayed with Elaine the whole the time. The early labor was long, but the end was quick and Gwen has a whole head of curly brown hair! Dad finally got to cut the umbilical cord. Elaine got to hold her prize, Gwen, a few seconds after birth.
It seems to me, what the locusts have eaten, God is beginning to restore.

Joel 2:24-26
24 The threshing floors will again be piled high with grain,
and the presses will overflow with new wine and olive oil.
25 The Lord says, “I will give you back what you lost
to the swarming locusts, the hopping locusts,
the stripping locusts, and the cutting locusts.
It was I who sent this great destroying army against you.
26 Once again you will have all the food you want,
and you will praise the Lord your God,
who does these miracles for you.
Never again will my people be disgraced.

This is what God is doing in our life. He has begun to restore what we have lost. Sometimes this is hard to see, when we're in the midst of turmoil. I had to sit and hold Gwen to slow down long enough to see God working, to hear Him speak in a still small voice. Yes, its been that busy.
Is the road ahead free from trouble and easy? Probably not, but for a moment, I was offered a glimpse beyond the here and now to where my family is going in this adventure called life.

Waiting on the Lord

Psalm 37:34
Wait for the LORD and keep His way. He will exalt you to inherit the land;

Waiting is difficult. I'm the go and do it now, type person. I feel like I've had nothing to do all week, and in that I time have really done nothing. I could have worked on my house, I could have made some new spreadsheets for the industry I'm in. I could have finished the bookcase I started a couple of months ago. I could have cleaned the garage. I could have reorganized the now very mess computer filing system, as we went from 2 computers to 1 and everything has been shuffled around in the last couple of months.

I've been reading in the Psalms, as I read through the Bible in a year. I admit, I'm a little behind in my schedule. I've enjoyed the Psalms. The heart cries of David and the other psalmists.

I spent the whole week waiting for an email or phone call, and few ever came. I feel like I'm at the edge of a new world, and the fog has not lifted on the new day, so I can see the horizon. I sit and wait, a new day is dawning, and as our pastor preached this morning, "God is good all the time, All the time God is good." I wait, I must leave it in His hands. I know that He has never abandoned me, I have never starved, I have always had what I needed. This time is no different, there are more family responsibilities, but "God is good all the time, All the time, God is good."

Prayer requests:
*Pray for wisdom and guidance, as I may look in a new direction for employment.
*Pray for a healthy mom and baby, who is due soon (May 3rd).

Praise:
*Our many friends and family who are encouraging and helping us.
*Sleep! I have been able to catch up on sleep.

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Train for Battle

Psalm 144:1
Praise be to the LORD my Rock,
who trains my hands for war,
my fingers for battle.

When I first stumbled across this verse, I thought, "Wow, cool verse!" Then I began to think more about it, and then I wondered what translation they had used, this is the NIV for those that like to keep track. I wanted to be sure that I had a solid translation, so I could understand it, and the context, why would David write it?

Are we trained? Have we allowed to God to train us? How do we do battle? How do we fight? We fight not with physical swords and shields (lots of fun to play with sharp pointy objects, check out the nearest Renaissance Faire), but we wrestle with powers and principalities that we cannot see.

It is a spiritual fight. Actually its easier than we think, but it's the toughest thing we'll ever do:

• It's easier than we think because the battle's already been won. The penalty has been paid by Jesus on the cross.
• It's the toughest thing we'll ever do, because we are so easily fooled into complacency by the enemy, lured into compliance with sin by our old nature.

What's this contrast, then and how does letting God train our fingers for battle? For me it is the gift of a sharp technical mind combined with a gift of writing (not world class like Solzhenitsyn), but hopefully improving. One of the things I set out to do about a year ago was to write a story for our daughter explaining the deeper truths of being a child of God. She is a full heir to the kingdom, because she has accepted Jesus as Savior. What the project became was a story, Princess Afeicta is Named an Heir, a renaissance princess (her alter-ego) is named an heir to the kingdom, even though she is a daughter. I've posted it to WordPress so you can access it, personalize it and print it out to read to your daughter(s).

What's your fingers trained to do?

Bruised, but not destroyed

Isaiah 42:3
A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice;

Here I am sitting at my home computer, just a couple of days after being let go from where I worked. Actually as I work through the shock, I feel the gorilla is off my back. I don't know what tomorrow holds, or where I'll be working, but that's ok. God's taking care of us and doing a fine job.

* Thank you Lord that we have all the baby items in hand and paid for, before she comes.
* Thank the Lord that we have paid off 2 debts and if work is found, will pay off the third by June.
* Thank the Lord, that we can pay all the bills to the end of the month.
* Thank the Lord that our doctor's office gave us a 4 month supply of asthma medicine for Moriah ($400), and wrote out a prescription for 1 month as well.
* All the prescriptions and 3 doctor's visits were covered on the very last day of coverage.
* I can look forward to my weekend, with my girls(2 1/2 and one on the way).
* My wife is at a ladies retreat, and they are just loving her and lifting her up.
* I was able to back up any critical items on the laptop, to other media, so that we lost very little data.
* Already there are employment options opening up.
* Believers are rallying around us, and let us know they care.

The specter that has loomed from the end of last year has left. I was getting drained quickly, having been on the go, for far too long. Perhaps, I'll find some job that I like even better, helping people with their energy use. Perhaps, God will lead me out of this field altogether and into full time ministry.

I'm a blind man, led by the Lord, Himself. Waiting is hard, but He has only plans to prosper us. Prosper not to wealth and fame, but prosper in the faith. I rest in His love and grace. Tomorrow the blind steps of faith will come, and we'll set off on a new journey.

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Update 4/11/07

It's been a week. God has been good. I have had a couple of interviews. One might pan out to something.

Praises:
*Health Insurance is still in force, covered a doctor's visit and prescription.
*Generous friends have helped us along the way.
*Part time/Consultant work is something I can do immediately.

Prayer:
*We are going to try and maintain the health insurance through a COBRA until the baby is born, through some generous friends.
*Business sense to understand how to run a business of my own if this is one of the next steps.
*Return calls from other contacts I've left messages with.
*Waiting is hard.


Waiting upon the Lord is very hard for me, I'm a go do it kind of person.

Psalm 130:5-6
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope.

My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning,

I know the path is dark, but the light will come in the morning and then we'll see clearly and know the way to take.

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